The Master/slave Dynamic

In Master/slave relationships, both parties must consider what is being offered for submission and surrender, and what is being accepted as responsibility. This requires thoughtful consideration, mindful reflection, open communication, and informed consent.

A power exchange, to any degree, is an ongoing, evolving process. This progression includes applying and dedicating specific parts of their lives to the exchange with clarity, understanding, and consent, creating increasing layers and levels of authority exchange and intensity.

The Master accepts authority, takes consensual ownership of His slave as his literal property, and accepts responsibility for her life and well-being, while His slave surrenders total control of her physical body, her heart, her mind, her soul, and her free will over to her Master.

The Master claims his property and owns His slave in a loving and committed dynamic, just as someone owns and cares for a cherished pet.

A Master/slave relationship is a beautiful, treasured connection in which one person transfers authority and power to another. The Master commands and leads, while His slave obeys and follows. Such lifestyle choices are founded upon good communication, admiration, honesty, respect, and earned trust.

A total power exchange Master/slave relationship requires a great deal of work, trust, and communication. This is not an easy relationship model because it requires high emotional intelligence and self-awareness, which both parties must cultivate.

The slave, quite literally, becomes the property of her Master, who controls and determines all aspects of her life in the present and future.

Regarding the health of Master/slave relationships, it would be difficult to find a more powerful, equitably balanced, and mutually beneficial dynamic than this.

The Master and slave respect, honor, and deeply care for each other far beyond the passionate sexual relationship they enjoy.

The Master and His slave communicate honestly and openly and share their hopes, thoughts, dreams, wishes, and desires. They do not hide any secrets from each other.

Going into a Master/slave relationship proves most successful when both parties know what they want and have learned enough about themselves to know that a total power exchange dynamic will bring them higher satisfaction and fulfillment.

The power exchange aspect of their relationship is often a core need for them both. With open discussion and consent, the Master and His slave fully understand what they are getting into and can negotiate what they want to do (for themselves) and what they are willing to do (for each other).

Comparisons of various relationship dynamics within the BDSM community.

• “Top/bottom play is about the physical body, Dominant/submissive play is about the mental body, and Master/slave relationships are about the spiritual body.” (Master Skip Chasey)

• “Top/bottom play is about the sexual self, Dominant/submissive is about energy, and Master/slave relationships are about the spiritual." (Master Steve Sampson)

The Master defines and establishes the relationship according to His vision for their dynamic. To do this effectively, He must have advanced BDSM knowledge, along with extensive experience and understanding of the Master/slave lifestyle choice and the responsibilities of these roles. This includes demonstrating core values and reasonable proficiency in using and maintaining their toys and equipment.

The slave's judgment, feedback, and personality are highly valued by her Master, who devotes much of His time, effort, and attention to her care, protection, development, and happiness.

This is a consensual process that must be extensively negotiated. The Master/slave dynamic is recognized as a total power exchange, and consent is considered irrevocable after their full negotiation is completed and the contract has been signed.

Once the slave agrees to transfer complete authority to her Master, she relinquishes any ongoing right to offer her consent again or to withdraw her consent in the future.

The slave’s right of consent has already been transferred to her Master in advance, based on the fully negotiated terms of their relationship contract, rather than through any specific actions they may take.

If the slave’s consent should ever be violated or broken in some way, then the Master/slave dynamic is also considered broken, similar to a marriage ending in divorce. Safewords are, therefore, only used as emergency stops instead of as the slave withdrawing her consent.

Master/slave relationships sometimes fail because the partners' core values or assumptions are not fully aligned. While each partner may use the same terms, "Master" and "slave," they are unlikely to have a 100% identical match about what those words mean from the very beginning.

Unless the Master and his slave carefully discuss each other's personal values, traits, dreams, wants, and needs, there will likely be recurring surprises as they continue to get to know one another.

The risk in not working through this exercise is that the Master or His slave may have been attracted to their partner's "public face" rather than to their "core being." While that may not be a bad thing, it may lead them both to need to reevaluate and readjust their evolving dynamic more than expected.